I related to so much of this, and especially appreciated your reframing of FOMO v. nostalgia. Feel that so deeply. I find myself saying, “I remember when…” or “In my time…” so much and have to stop myself lest I sound like a granny! Times change, and we change. That evolution is such a test of the soul, and can really fuck with our concept of self-worth and want, hut ultimately we are better for it. (Or I like to think so!) Thank you for providing some communal validation in this beautiful piece of writing!
Loved this one. I just had to say, while I understand what you’re saying about FOMO and your similarity to Garance in some ways, I’ve been reading her for ages and I’ve had to stop because her life is just so very unrelatable. Every time she settles she unsettles, and it’s on to a new shiny, flashy thing. She is also very tormented about her age, weight, relevancy etc. As a 48 year old women I had to stop reading her as the FOMO for me was real, and it made me feel worse.
I wish her well but I much prefer reading your stack, as you truly see people for who they are (as opposed to foils or accessories) and seem deeply confident in your skin and in your chosen place. As always I appreciate your honesty and insight. ❤️
you are 100% entitled to your take! i really admire garance's honesty and openness. it takes a lot of courage to admit to your insecurities. it is incredibly hard to age gracefully in the public eye. as to me and confidence? ha! i've got you fooled!
meanwhile let a thousand stacks bloom. (i guess that's already handled.)
I will read whatever you write, always. I feel lucky to have been able to read you as I was figuring out my own writing career (?!) and even luckier to read your personal tales here. These feelings are not only relatable but cyclical and you did a kindness to all of us by sharing this so honestly. Ps. Eleanor, like my little guys, can clearly get away with anything 😉
girl. lucy is even worse. where eleanor is a pudgy good time charlie, lucy is fiendishly interested in what lies behind every cabinet door and mirror. she is elusive and the prettiest girl you have ever seen, so you're just insanely in love. and then she tries to take the bathroom mirror off its nail and you go in and tell her no, and she sasses back knowing she is beat, and it's the funniest thing in the world.
and to you: keep fighting the good fight on the paris journalism front. we need good, smart, deep thinking people on the front lines. that industry is so fucked, but that city is still so great. i'm glad you have maintained pole position.
I’m so glad I found your Substack Alexandra. I’m a boomer in Australia who loves to read of your life and adventures in France, and descriptions of your life in the village and also your previous work life. Thankyou, you’re such a good writer - I’m right there with you on your travels and observations of people.
thank you so much for the good word! where are you in oz? i've still never been but some of my closest friends are australians and i love you people. best comedy in the world.
I live in Victoria, not far from Melbourne. Into our first month of winter but nowhere near as cold as some parts of Europe. Very different scenery here compared to your lovely French countryside. Our comedy I think is more like the British and we love “taking the piss “ out of ourselves and others.
Ah well, the Substack Algorithm must have looped me into receiving updates on Garance Dore's writing.
I have (almost) exited my career in Home Fashion and Retail -- I've got one foot halfway in and want out, yet keep getting seduced back by....FOMO and Nostalgia for the grand old days of better department stores, designers, and the lure of great merchandise.
Yet here I am, not unlike you, in a 1000 person village, where the locals gather in the morning at the bar across from me for a 1:1 ratio of Pastis and coffee.
I recently went to Rome for a short visit -- walking the streets in a nostalgia filled haze from the '80's.
In truth, it was a mosh pit, elbowing my way through crowds eating Porchetta sandwiches and gelato in skin tight athleisure wear...
Finally, thank you again Alexandra for 'bringing it home." Your writing is uplifting.
I could never be a ghost writer like you, instead, i've created "private label" products for retailers and chefs large and small, and remain behind the curtain....
ha you are in a bubbling metropolis compared to me and i'd LOVE for an actual bar or cafe in our burg. but i get you.
thank you for the kind words. it sounds like you kind of are ghost writing, in your field. it's a really interesting situation which makes you question your own motives. am i doing what i do for love of the craft? (i definitely am.) is it weird to adjust your ego so majorly, especially at a certain age? yes but this is also what we live for and it's an amazing opportunity for growth. it's incredible to see evidence of your expertise and authority, which is constantly validated, because it's really clear what you bring to that arrangement--even if the rest of the outside world doesn't necessarily see it.
You are a talented writer who has a gift; you also say it like it is, which is an act of courage in itself. There is a place for you in this universe, other than just writing for others. It takes time to process such changes when you had such a comfortable grasp on the magazine world. I hope you’ll keep searching…..
oh of course i'll be working on this stuff til i'm dead in the ground! i actually really love ghost writing, i take it seriously, am grateful for the opportunity and each experience. i have partnered with inspiring people and that's special. tending more to my own garden has been a struggle for me since forever.
I savored every single word, Alex.
I related to so much of this, and especially appreciated your reframing of FOMO v. nostalgia. Feel that so deeply. I find myself saying, “I remember when…” or “In my time…” so much and have to stop myself lest I sound like a granny! Times change, and we change. That evolution is such a test of the soul, and can really fuck with our concept of self-worth and want, hut ultimately we are better for it. (Or I like to think so!) Thank you for providing some communal validation in this beautiful piece of writing!
Loved this one. I just had to say, while I understand what you’re saying about FOMO and your similarity to Garance in some ways, I’ve been reading her for ages and I’ve had to stop because her life is just so very unrelatable. Every time she settles she unsettles, and it’s on to a new shiny, flashy thing. She is also very tormented about her age, weight, relevancy etc. As a 48 year old women I had to stop reading her as the FOMO for me was real, and it made me feel worse.
I wish her well but I much prefer reading your stack, as you truly see people for who they are (as opposed to foils or accessories) and seem deeply confident in your skin and in your chosen place. As always I appreciate your honesty and insight. ❤️
you are 100% entitled to your take! i really admire garance's honesty and openness. it takes a lot of courage to admit to your insecurities. it is incredibly hard to age gracefully in the public eye. as to me and confidence? ha! i've got you fooled!
meanwhile let a thousand stacks bloom. (i guess that's already handled.)
FOMO vs Nostalgia, Wow. Thank you for spelling out the distinction 🙏
I will read whatever you write, always. I feel lucky to have been able to read you as I was figuring out my own writing career (?!) and even luckier to read your personal tales here. These feelings are not only relatable but cyclical and you did a kindness to all of us by sharing this so honestly. Ps. Eleanor, like my little guys, can clearly get away with anything 😉
girl. lucy is even worse. where eleanor is a pudgy good time charlie, lucy is fiendishly interested in what lies behind every cabinet door and mirror. she is elusive and the prettiest girl you have ever seen, so you're just insanely in love. and then she tries to take the bathroom mirror off its nail and you go in and tell her no, and she sasses back knowing she is beat, and it's the funniest thing in the world.
and to you: keep fighting the good fight on the paris journalism front. we need good, smart, deep thinking people on the front lines. that industry is so fucked, but that city is still so great. i'm glad you have maintained pole position.
Isn’t it hysterical how so very different they can be?! I’d love a non stop video of those gals getting into trouble 😆
And thank you for saying that. Hoping anti-intellectualism doesn’t make all of us obsolete here but I’ll keep on until that happens !
I’m so glad I found your Substack Alexandra. I’m a boomer in Australia who loves to read of your life and adventures in France, and descriptions of your life in the village and also your previous work life. Thankyou, you’re such a good writer - I’m right there with you on your travels and observations of people.
thank you so much for the good word! where are you in oz? i've still never been but some of my closest friends are australians and i love you people. best comedy in the world.
I live in Victoria, not far from Melbourne. Into our first month of winter but nowhere near as cold as some parts of Europe. Very different scenery here compared to your lovely French countryside. Our comedy I think is more like the British and we love “taking the piss “ out of ourselves and others.
Ah well, the Substack Algorithm must have looped me into receiving updates on Garance Dore's writing.
I have (almost) exited my career in Home Fashion and Retail -- I've got one foot halfway in and want out, yet keep getting seduced back by....FOMO and Nostalgia for the grand old days of better department stores, designers, and the lure of great merchandise.
Yet here I am, not unlike you, in a 1000 person village, where the locals gather in the morning at the bar across from me for a 1:1 ratio of Pastis and coffee.
I recently went to Rome for a short visit -- walking the streets in a nostalgia filled haze from the '80's.
In truth, it was a mosh pit, elbowing my way through crowds eating Porchetta sandwiches and gelato in skin tight athleisure wear...
Finally, thank you again Alexandra for 'bringing it home." Your writing is uplifting.
I could never be a ghost writer like you, instead, i've created "private label" products for retailers and chefs large and small, and remain behind the curtain....
Bon Journée du sud!
ha you are in a bubbling metropolis compared to me and i'd LOVE for an actual bar or cafe in our burg. but i get you.
thank you for the kind words. it sounds like you kind of are ghost writing, in your field. it's a really interesting situation which makes you question your own motives. am i doing what i do for love of the craft? (i definitely am.) is it weird to adjust your ego so majorly, especially at a certain age? yes but this is also what we live for and it's an amazing opportunity for growth. it's incredible to see evidence of your expertise and authority, which is constantly validated, because it's really clear what you bring to that arrangement--even if the rest of the outside world doesn't necessarily see it.
PS. Anne Thomas - Anne of Green Places on Substack will be able to identify your tree.
You are a talented writer who has a gift; you also say it like it is, which is an act of courage in itself. There is a place for you in this universe, other than just writing for others. It takes time to process such changes when you had such a comfortable grasp on the magazine world. I hope you’ll keep searching…..
oh of course i'll be working on this stuff til i'm dead in the ground! i actually really love ghost writing, i take it seriously, am grateful for the opportunity and each experience. i have partnered with inspiring people and that's special. tending more to my own garden has been a struggle for me since forever.
I enjoy your writing and relate to your dilemmas. I’m assuming you’re in French countryside and not Ohio :).
Spot-on, thank you.
Absolutely relatable and thought provoking. XO
you know the world of which i speak, friend.
MAGAZINES.